Pregnancy can turn a man on or off. Jim told me, During our first pregnancy I just couldn’t cope with the idea of having intercourse. It wasn’t that I found Tanya unattractive, it was just that the first few times we tried it after we found out she was pregnant, I kept imagining this little person inside being bumped around like a punching bag, and I was afraid of hurting it. I felt like I was intruding. Tanya worried about Jim’s lack of interest. It was impossible to convince him that he wasn’t actually hurting the baby. I think he knew but he couldn’t overcome it, so sex was virtually non-existent with the first pregnancy. I wouldn’t have minded so much except he stopped any sort of intimacy, so at times I felt quite neglected. Now I”m pregnant again and he hasn’t lost his sex drive at all this time but because we have a toddler who won’t sleep through the night, that”s getting in the way now.

Although it is a really common concern for both men and women, in the vast majority of cases sex does absolutely no harm to the mother or the unborn baby. However, there will be some cases when a doctor might have to caution against intercourse during pregnancy for medical reasons. If this is the case it can be very difficult for both partners unless the reasons are explained in detail, and they have a chance to ask any questions they may have. It may help to explore other ways of making love without vaginal penetration. Again, adaptability is the buzz-word.


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